The Problem Isn’t Dating—It’s Your Delusions

Why You Keep Losing in Love, Blaming the Pool, and Ignoring the Mirror

By Dr. Katrina Marie | Love and Lifestyle Magazine

Let’s cut the B.S... ok!! Dating is not your problem. Your delusions are.

Delusions that “everyone’s a cheater.” Delusions that “all the good ones are taken.” Delusions that love has ghosted your entire generation. Let’s be clear: Good love still exists. Solid people are still dating with intention. But if you’re running every connection through filters built from trauma, TikTok rants, and low expectations—you’re not dating… you’re

dodging.

It’s time to reset your mindset and take accountability for what and who you’re choosing. Because sometimes it’s not the dating pool that’s toxic… it’s the goggles you’re swimming in.

The Stick & Move Rule: Quit Fast, Heal Smart

If it doesn’t feel aligned—move. If it’s inconsistent, unclear, or full of excuses—move. If you’re

over-explaining your worth or downplaying your needs—MOVE.

Dating is not about collecting bodies, it’s about connecting with alignment. You are not obligated to stay where

you're tolerated. You're called to grow where you're celebrated.

And that growth? It starts with accountability.

What You Believe Drives Who You Choose

If you believe everyone is a liar, a cheat, or a game-player, that’s all your energy will attract or entertain. But if

you believe in healing, in growth, and in partnership with purpose—you’ll start to date like it.

Successful dating is 30% luck, 70% clarity and effort. And most importantly? It’s not about “finding

someone.” It’s about becoming someone who’s ready to choose and be chosen with intention.

You Are What You Consume (And Who Cooked It Matters)

You’ve heard the saying, “You are what you eat,” right?

Well in dating... you are what you consume emotionally, mentally, AND romantically. And just like food, it ain’t just about what you take in… it’s who cooked it. You wouldn’t eat at a restaurant with rats in the reviews. You wouldn’t let somebody with a track record of

burning spaghetti cook your Thanksgiving dinner. So why are you listening to podcasts and influencers who's main ingredients in their sauce are bad experiences, negativity, and lack of accountablity?

Let’s stop blaming the recipe—or the stove—when the chef ain’t qualified.

A lot of y’all are dating people who can’t nurture, can’t communicate, can’t lead, can’t receive love—and instead of putting the fork down, you just keep going back for seconds because “they look good on paper.”

Yea.. naw!! You don’t need another influencer yelling at you about what you “deserve.” You need stillness. You need strategy. And you need the courage to heal your own heart before handing it over like a free sample at a food court.

So before you start claiming dating is dead, ask yourself: Is it really dead… or are you just dating on autopilot while dragging the same delusions from date to date?

You deserve better. But you also have to believe better, choose better, and be better to attract it. The problem isn’t dating—it’s the lies you’ve started believing about yourself, others, and what love even ooks like.

Heal. Reflect. Move smarter. And this cuffing season? Let clarity be the new sexy